Threesome Sex - Rules of Engagement



Threesome sex will become an eye-opening, beautiful new reality for you when you decide to expand the borders of your current relationship. If you are a woman, you may decide to embrace your female bi-curious side.

You also may want to evolve from monogamy into the new and exciting world of open relationships. You may simply be attracted to a single beautiful stranger and want to share this experience with your current partner.

In some cases, you will be on your way to discover something you actually already wanted to do for a LONG TIME but were scared to admit even to yourself.

This was my case. I was into polyamory since my teenage years but I was so heavily socially conditioned that I did not dare to admit this even to myself until my late twenties.

I did not fit into the mainstream monogamy paradigm at all and consequently all my long-term relationships based on committed monogamy failed on by one. It took me quite a few years to dismiss the old paradigm and build a new one from scratch.

Threesome sex (or even foursome or fivesome if you wish so) will eventually become your reality and hugely increase the vitality and strength of your current relationship. In addition, your partner’s bi-curiosity will be satisfied.

Nevertheless, for a couple (both female-female and male-female) there are some important challenges that arise after you decide to go and try threesome sex. There are few dangerous underwater stones to avoid. Unless you take care of them - they may cost you your relationship.

I am serious. Read carefully. Follow these rules and relationship advice.

Discovering this stuff took me and my (girl)friends quite some years and a few broken relationships. Take advantage of someone else’s experiences and avoid those nasty pitfalls.


THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE ON YOUR WAY TO THREESOME SEX



Most challenging for you both will be the emotional challenge your woman is going through during the whole experience. Her biggest worry will be, “Will my partner stay with me after he tried another woman?”

Her next question will become, “Is s(he) doing it FOR ME and OUR RELATIONSHIP? Or is it just for his (her) own pleasures and may be s(he) is even using me as a bait?”

Read these rules on sexuality before you continue with the rest of this article. They will set up a solid healthy ground for any kind of sexual experience.

Properly applied they will help you immensely. Don’t just read – execute them.


RULE 1. COMMUNICATE!



Communicate beforehand! Discuss what is appropriate and what is not appropriate for your woman during the threesome sex. Listen carefully what she has to say. Share your own fears and desires.

My take on it (and remember - I am in a polyamorous relationship) looks like this: we are bringing in a new, interesting, and cool girl for friendship and sex. Threesome is just another way to connect with a new person. If my girl and I are going to like this new woman then she may become our new partner and a good friend. If not – we let chips fall where they may.

For a woman in a committed monogamous relationship it will be very important to know that threesome sex will not take place often. She might be scared of the thought that threesome sex may replace your usual one-on-one intimacy. It is your job to ensure her that this is not going to be the case and to keep this promise. (Unless one day you both discuss and agree otherwise.)

Your woman may also want to ensure that you are not going to have sex with others unless she is participating. Whatever the case may be - make honest agreements, set up the rules, and follow them.

Be careful with doing things during the threesome sex that you never did before with your current partner. It may cause her to feel like you somehow cannot express yourself with her sexually one-on-one.


RULE 2. DIVIDE YOUR ATTENTION 80-20



This is 80% - 20% rule. During the intercourse, you will give 80% of your attention to your current partner and only 20% to a new girl.

This is a very important principle for you to understand whether you are a man or a female (leading) partner in a lesbian relationship.

If during the threesome sex, you are going to give biggest part of your attention to a new girl then your partner will get jealous, offended, and might get an idea that she is not good enough for you anymore.

Realize it. Stay aware of this ALL THE TIME.

Do not just jump on a new girl however strong the chemistry between two of you may be. It will hurt your current partner. Put yourself in her shoes for a second. Feel how it feels like. Are you getting the idea now?

See, you are in the beginning of a wonderful journey; you are starting to expand your horizon. This is just a step stone into a new life. Begin it carefully. Mind your step.

What if your woman gets too busy with a new girl and forgets you? If you mind - you can express it softly after the threesome sex is over and another girl is gone. In my experience, it rather was ME in the past who sometimes forgot to pay most of my attention to my woman.

Though I understand that it is not easy at all to give all your attention to your current partner while there is a new woman right next to you (hot, interesting, open, and sexy) - you still have to stay conscious and aware of the facts as I tell you.

At some point, your woman may direct you towards the new girl. Do it but still remember to come back after a few minutes. Otherwise, your partner might begin to feel abandoned.

Note: Alcohol may increase your partner's emotional sensitivity and make things look more dramatic. It is therefore better to stay reasonably sober during your threesome sex experience.

How long will you keep this 80-20 rule? After a while, 80-20 will become 70-30 or even 50-50. I would not suggest giving your partner LESS then half of your attention. With a time, you will get an intuitive understanding of the threesome sex dynamics.

Stay conscious of this rule. If you break it, you introduce a split into your relationship. Remember, all happens for your woman’s pleasure.

You are not going to hurt her, right? In the past, I made this mistake a couple of times myself even though I thought I was very conscious of my girl. We had a discussion afterwards and our quest for new threesomes was delayed for a while.

On the other hand, you may let your women and a new girl to play with each other as much as possible. Take a position of a leader but stay sort of above the scene.

Following this rule is sometimes not easy but the difference between following and NOT following these rules is a difference between HAVING and NOT HAVING a relationship after the threesome sex is over.


RULE 3. DIVIDE YOUR ATTENTION 50-50 AFTER THREESOME SEX IS OVER



You just established an intimate bond with a new woman. After the sex is over be social and give her your warmth, attention, and acceptance. You are now in a small social group of three.

When threesome sex is over your women wants to be social, share experiences and communicate with you and another woman. Participate in it and divide your attention equally now.

If you are too closed and talk mostly with your woman or just shut up – both women may assume that you did not enjoy what happened or even worse – new girl might think that you did it just for your own selfish needs and now you are just waiting for her to leave. Even if you are sleepy and tired – stay social and nice. Divide your attention equally and make sure everybody is enjoying the afterglow.


RULE 4. YOUR RELATIONSHIP ONLY GETS BETTER



Threesome sex happens for you both and is meant to strengthen and expand your relationship. Do your best to convey this idea to your partner. Be honest and congruent with it.

You are bringing the third person only to enhance and to enrich the relationship between two of you. This whole threesome sex thing is done for your own and for your partner’s further growth and development.

Don’t just read this. Apply these rules and enjoy the results. The world has many more beautiful, sensual, and thrilling experiences for you. Stay open. Keep exploring.



Related Articles:

Sexuality Outlined. Plain and Simple.

Female Sexuality - Newly Acknowledged and Celebrated.

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