Free Yourself: Make Your Sexuality a Source of Freedom and Joy for You!
To deny these facts equals pain and suffering. To be happy and fulfilled we must see ourselves as sexual beings.
The truth is that in our longing to share love with another person intimacy and sex play crucial role.
The way modern society makes men and women think about themselves is deeply influenced by commercialization and marketing. Corporations spend billions on creating a gap between men and women so they can sell them goods and services.
Primary goal of many marketing campaigns is to create and sustain an illusion that there is a war of sexes. Main message here goes like this: without latest gadgets, perfumes or cloths opposite sex will never find you attractive.
Modern society teaches men that working hard and having social status (read buying goods that indicate the belonging to a group with high status) will almost automatically guarantee a beautiful girlfriend in their lives. Nothing is further from the truth.
Alcohol advertisements constantly recreate images of people drinking and having great success with opposite sex. Alternatively, someone driving a luxurious car or wearing a nice watch and having a beautiful woman next to him.
All ads to the same message: you are not good enough as you are. You must add something external to yourself to become perfect and complete. Only then, success will find you. Do not buy into this paradigm. Just laugh it off!
So for too many men the process of seeing themselves as sexual beings is hugely influenced by the outside world. Modern men look for external sources to validate themselves and to prove their worthiness.
Men's first impulse when they see a woman that they find attractive is immediately obscured by a second thought: “Am I good enough for her? Do I have any proof of it? “
His next thought usually is “Do I have what it takes according to all the years of social programming to approach her?”
On the other hand, women are constantly bombarded by various messages telling that without latest fashion trend or a certain kind of make-up or whatever else they will not be good enough and the right men will not notice them. In addition, society loads women with feeling of guilt and shame for their natural sexual desires and wishes.
Again, nothing can be further from the truth. Realize it and free yourself from this oppressive paradigm. Go have fun outside of it! That is where your power is laying asleep waiting to wake up.
Sexual desire works a bit differently for men and women. To become sexually aroused a man most of the time needs to see a woman just for a split second.
He knows in an instant whether he wants to sleep with her or not.
On the other hand, a woman needs a while to find out about man's personality traits so she will decide on sleeping with him or not.
In this sense, we can say that man is more like a light switch and a woman is rather like a volume knob.
This is totally justified from the evolutionary point of view.
During the sexual intercourse, men's natural tendency is to reach an orgasm quickly (i.e. ejaculate) and women's – to flow, enjoy, and share the intimacy much longer. Again, I am a bit generalizing here – a “quickie” is refreshing and exciting for both genders but only from time to time. It is something to spice up your intimate life, no more.
After sex many men tend to fall asleep (do not blame them, ladies, chemicals are at play). Immediately after the intercourse, some men want to continue their day, go do things or they may plainly get dressed and leave (shame on them!). Meanwhile women just want to cuddle, chat, and simply enjoy the afterglow together.
It is also extremely important to realize that women are mostly driven by EMOTIONS and men by LOGIC.
Men are happy after having an intellectual discussion or watching sports. Those are sources of good emotions for them. Men feel fine after a good positive conversation with an old friend and a knowledge that their business is going well.
Women on the other hand can have all the above and still be emotionally unfulfilled. To fulfill that need for emotional content they will write poetry, watch soap operas and drama movies and talk endlessly with each other on topics that most men finds totally … hmmm... to say at least ...unmoving.
For a balanced relationship (in bed and outside of it), men really have to go out and learn about things that interest women.
Man has to admit to himself that there is a whole layer of knowledge he knows nothing about and in order to be able to create and sustain any kind of fulfilling relationship including sexual he has to go out and learn a lot.
The above tendencies (logic vs. emotion, physiological differences, etc.) often become first points of irritation and eventual breakups.
Some of the above points I have learned quite easily and some hard way. In both cases, I have taken a lot of time and effort to apply them to my intimate relationships.
So, what does it boil down to? Click here to find out all about 4 Golden Rules on Sexual Behavior that will make your sexuality a source of freedom and joy...
Preparing to See Her squirt. Clearing Up Misconceptions.