The Structure of Successful Interaction. Part 5 – Secret of Seduction. Build Comfort!

The biggest secret of seduction is layng right there in front of everyone’s eyes. However, very few people take time to invest in this crucial part of the interaction. What's that? Get to know another person and build some substantial level of comfort and trust.

They rather behave as a racing car’ drivers, trying to cut all corners and save as much time as possible.

Note: if you have not read the introduction article to this series on the structure of how to meet girls – do it now.

Back to the subject. Ask any girl you know and she will confirm – if the guy is cool, interaction is fun, and he takes time to get to know her – sex is INEVITABLE.

It’s like, “OK, now we both know that we are cool, fun, and sexy. Let’s go to bed.”

Therefore, this secret of seduction is worth a deeper insight.

At this stage of the interaction, the girl likes you and you two have some history together. As you now from the previous chapter, that history is built by walking around the club, sitting at various places in the bar, or looking for some people you want her to meet. Eventually, it is better to lead her to some other venue, a chill-out place, or a cafe.

The same rules apply for a birthday party, a corporate dinner, or any other place.

Now it is time to drop conversation ratio from 80-20 (meaning that before you spoke 80% of the time and she about 20%) to 50-50. Let her invest some energy into gaming YOU. It is also an imperative part of this secret of seduction.

Remember, you approached her with the mindset of ‘I love myself, and girls already like me. Let’s see if they are cool enough and interesting FOR ME.” Now the time is right to let the girl to convey her personality to you.

Even the most beautiful women don’t want to be valued for their looks alone. This stage of the interaction is precisely good for finding out cool and interesting details about her. Let her communicate those things to you. Do not make it an interview. Give her a chance of asking YOU questions.

At this point, you allow yourself to pull back a bit and let her do some work too. This part is very arousing for the girl because as you know human beings do not value things that they can easily get.

The more efforts are being put into something, the more value we tend to ascribe to that whether it is a material thing or a person. This is another secret of seduction you learn here.

Note: do not be afraid to walk away if you discover that for some reason she is not compatible with you. (Examples may be drugs, alcohol, ego issues, validation seeker, etc.)


At this stage, you are enjoying a good conversation. There are already some common grounds between you and the girl and you both participate about 50-50 in the interaction.

You are a cool guy and she is trying to find out things about you and to project her personality even more. Your interaction is a combination of stories, comments, and questions.

It is light and fun for both of you. Remember, she is an EMOTIONAL creature so do not fall into boring logical monologues about the advantages of liquid coolers for pc processors. Simply chat and get to know each other.

Important notes: 1) Remember to touch her physically slowly building it up from the early stages on. Read this article on touching. 2) Woman will not lead you. She wants you to lead her to where she wants to go.

Good sign is that both of you are so in the moment that you forget about the time and your surroundings.

Inevitably, you will rise the sexual tension and be very close to kissing her. She also might initiate kissing first. A short make out session (only one!) is more than enough. In addition, YOU have to be the one breaking it.

The rule of a thumb is – do not make out in a club or a bar. This is also an important secret of seduction.

Kissing is a clear physical indication to the girl that you are interested in her sexually. Everything that is obvious and predictable stops becoming intriguing or attractive.

All that kills sexual tension is no good. Instead, be patient, cool, and LEAD.

This next article will reveal more secrets of seduction before you take a girl home or get her phone number (if you choose to do so)...

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